what the hell is going on
by JOEYLOVER9274
Summary: Pheobe and Joey hooked up,Chandler and Monica are having marriage problems and Rachel is investigating Ross' mysterious death.
1. la divorce

What The Hell Is Going On ch.1 la divorce  
  
The cars raced down the freeway one right after the other. Then suddenly the blue car swerved into the next lane and shot the drive of the porche. The car behind hit it and the porche burst into flames. Ross was no more the mian love of rachels life was gone and so was her joy and happiness.  
  
Meanwhile  
  
"Auntie monica" Emma shrieked as she ran into the room.  
  
Hi sweetie. why don't we go for a walk today.  
  
Ok. Emma replied as she went to go get her coat. At that very moment Chandler walked in.  
  
Hey Mon. whats up?  
  
Oh nothing. I was just thinking about when we have one of those.  
  
What a coat? Chandler joked.  
  
No a baby silly.  
  
Well monica, uhm i don't think i want to have a baby.  
  
Chandler that is such a selfish thing to say.  
  
What just because i don't want to have a baby that makes me selfish.  
  
Yes that makes you selfish. You don't want to bring another beautiful life in this world. God could you BE anymore clueless. I should have listened to my mother. Ishould have married a smart man. Now Richard he was smart.  
  
well why didn't you marry him? oh wait, HE DIDN'T WANT KIDS EITHER.  
  
Yeah but he had a reason for that. Also he was going to have one with me because he knew that i wanted one.  
  
Why did you say no then?  
  
Thats none of your concern. Right now we are talking about you.  
  
I don't want to talk about me right now.  
  
Oh. you know you are so pig headed. GET OUT AND DON'T COME BACK! I'll mail you the divorce papers.  
  
No need to i'm moving in with joey. you could just slip them under the door so we could save time and postage.  
  
Chandler opened the door and just as he was about to storm out rachel ran in crying.  
  
Rache whats wrong. Oh Monica. I I I don't know how to tell you this but... She took a few seconds to try to calm down.  
  
WHAT WHAT?  
  
Ross is dead.  
  
no no. How did this happen? Monica squeled as she began to cry. Tell me how? she yelled.  
  
A person shot him while he was driving. They still don't know who.  
  
Chandler went over to Monica to try to comfort her.  
  
GET OUT I don't want to be married to you anymore.  
  
So thats what he did he left while Monica was on the floor crying.  
  
2 days later  
  
Chandler woke up and sure enough under the door was the divorce papers with Monica's signiture on them.He picked them up and put them on the table. Then he sat down and stared at them. He just couldn't sign them. Slowly tears began to roll down his face.Then joey and Phoebe came out of joey's bedroom.  
  
Hey Chandler. Whats up?  
  
nothing i just finished signing the divorce papers. Now i'm going to go file them.  
  
Aww I'm sorry chandler.  
  
Me too Pheebs. Me too.  
  
oh nothing 


	2. el funeral

chapter 2 el funeral  
  
As chandler was walking down the street he started to day dream about his precious times with monica.  
  
flashback  
  
thanksgiving 1988  
  
Monica everyone's here ross rachel and the boy who hates thanksgiving.  
(monica walks down the stairs)  
  
Hey chandler  
  
Oh my god  
  
Whats the matter is there something on my dress.  
(monica spins around)  
  
No no you look great that dress that body.  
  
Dude  
  
Sorry  
  
And just at that very moment a loud annoying voice ended the dream.  
  
OH MY GOD  
  
Oh hi Janice  
  
Hi Chandler  
  
Whats the matter you don't look so good. Your so pale.  
  
Oh nothing I'm just going through some hard times like; divorce, moving and did i mention divorce.  
  
Yes you did.  
  
oh. Not to be rude or anything but janice i don't feel like talking to anyone right now.( and with that Chandler walked on slowly drifting into another dream.  
  
Flashback  
  
(Chandler opens the door to his and monica's apartment.)  
  
You wanted it to be a surprise (monica says as she gets down on one knee)  
Chandler in al the years that i have Known you I knew you were the one i was going to marry.(monica starts to cry)You know there is a reason why girls don't do this.  
  
Alright. (Chandler says as he gets down on one knee)  
Monica I thought marring you was the hardest thing i was every going to have to do but, I realized that its not...  
  
The door to his and joeys aprtment slamed and the dream was gone.  
  
Hey Chandler you better hurry up and get dressed for ross' funeral.  
  
Yeah. I'm going.(Chandler got into his suit and ran down to catch the limo with the others.)Oh thank god i made it.  
  
The funeral was very depressing for all the friends but rachel was the one who hurt the most. Rachel and monica both said the Euelogy. Then it was time for them to go to the cemetary. Everyone put a carnation on ross' coffin except rachel she had bought a bouquet of roses to put on it. Then the limo took them to the reception.(Rachel stayed at the grave sight.)  
  
Oh Ross Why did you have to go? Why?  
  
Flashback  
  
(everyone was gather around the tv set watching the video from Rachel and Monica's prom.)  
  
Guys I think we have seen enough. let's just turn it off.  
  
no no we want to see this.  
  
well i'm not gonna watch it.(He turned away just as they were watching Ross come out in a tux to take Rachel to the prom but, she was already leaving with Chip.)  
  
You did that for me. ( Rachel walked over to Ross and kissed him.)  
  
End of this flashback but the begginning of another  
  
(Cling cling Ross hit the glass in front of him.)  
  
Hi everyone you probably don't know me but I'm Ross Rachel's boyfriend. And It took alot of courage for Rachel to come back here and face all these people but she did. Also Rachel did not leave Barry because she had siffles(sorry i don't Know how to spell it.)She Left him because she didn't love him.So to recap:  
Took alot of courage Didn't love him anymore And doesn't have the siffles  
  
Oh my god i'll meet you in the parking lot  
  
And there she goes who had 9:45  
  
Then a loud thunder came and she ran from the cemetary to the street to catch a cab home.  
When she got there she ran into her room and cried herself to sleep. 


	3. the notes

chapter 3 the notes  
  
Rachel woke up the next day to the sound of the phone ringing. It was henry Ross'  
lawyer telling her that Ross had left her some stuff incase he ever died.Rachel qiuckly got dress and took a cab to Henry's office.  
  
Oh there you are mrs.Geller you may have a seat and I'll be with you in a moment.  
  
Ok (Rachel said as she was sitting down)  
  
Alright Mrs. Geller here is the box of stuff he left you i just need you to sigh here and here and then you may go.  
  
Monica could you open the door for me this is really heavy.  
  
I'm coming.Rachel what is all of this. This is the stuff Ross left me.  
  
Oh did he leave anything for me i don't know i have to check.(Rachel opened the box)  
Monica here is something for you.  
  
What is it?  
  
He left you this troll thing and a note.  
  
The Geller cup.  
  
Flashback  
  
Hey how about you Ross.  
  
Monica and I are not suppose to play football.  
  
Who said that your mother?  
  
Actually yes because every year on thanksgiving we would play a football game.  
  
It was called the Geller bowl and one year Geller bowl 6 i accidently broke Ross'  
nose but i scored the winning goal.  
  
No it did not count because of the barbaric nose breaking.  
  
No it counted.  
  
Monica. Monica are you ok?  
  
What? oh yeah I'm fine.  
(she said as she wiped a tear from her eye.)  
  
Hey we have to call phoebe and the guys over here they were left something too.  
  
ok. I'll call them.  
  
Monica opend the door and yelled across the hallway Phoebe,Joey,Chandler come here. At that moment they ran across the hall and leaped onto the couch.  
  
so whats up?(joey said while taking a soda out of the frige.)  
  
Ross left you guys some stuff.  
  
Like what?  
  
Rachel you can tell them.  
  
Well Joey you got a t.v. and a note, Pheobe you got a keyboard and a note,  
Chandler you got Ross's computer and a note and I got his apartment.  
  
What does everybody's notes say Monica you go first  
  
Dear Monica,  
  
If you are reading this message then i am no longer alive. I know you miss me and i know you love me. Well i love you too and some far away day you'll be with me in this happy place but for right now my spirt will always be with you.  
love Ross  
  
Now Pheebs.  
  
Dear Phoebe,  
  
Since you are reading this I must be in my next life. Well take care of the keyboard and who knows maybe you'll be playing that in the coffee house. Look out for me I might visit.(Ross joked)  
always Ross  
  
Chandler  
  
Dear Chandler,  
  
Who knows maybe you'll actually get some work done. Bsss yeah wirte I'm always there for you man and i'll miss you.  
  
your bud Ross  
  
Joey  
  
Dear Joey,  
  
Stay exactly the way you are only with a bigger t.v. I'll miss you man.Also go ahead and eat anything out of the frige cause i know i'm not going to eat it.  
from Ross  
  
What about you Rachel?  
  
I didn't get note.  
  
oh.  
  
Yeah guys I'm going to go to Ross'.  
  
Ok.  
  
Rachel got into the apartment and started to look around at all Ross' stuff but she didn't dare move anything. When she walk into the livingroom a book fell off the shelf. On the front cover it said Ross and Rachel. She opened it and inside were pictures, movie ticket stubs,braclets from amusement parks,etc. Then she noticed a piece of paper stuck inbetween 2 pages. It was a note addressed to Rachel. She opened it and started to read it.  
  
Dear Rachel,  
  
I'm Real sorry I'm not with you. I know you miss me and I know you Love me. Rachel honey I love you too and I know it's hard but promise me you just think about the good times we had together. I Don't want you to cry for me just remember me and go on with your life. Remember I will always be with you as long as you follow your heart.  
I'll love you always Ross  
  
Rachel fell to the floor crying hysterically. Joey noticed this from the window across the street so he ran over to Ross' to see what was wrong. When he got there Rachel was lying on the couch reading the note over and over. Joey went up to her and hugged her while saying it will be ok soon. 


	4. SURPRISE

chapter 4 SURPRISE

Really joey how do you know that.

know what?

That it will all be over soon.

Oh. Because i just do.

Then they sat there in silence and slowly drifted off to sleep.

The day after...

Hey Monica do you know where joey is.

No i don't sorry Pheebs. Why?

Well he was supose to meet me for dinner last night but he never showed up. I'm really worried about him. He stayed out all night. oh no something terrible could have happened to him.

Oh my god. Monica said as she looked out the window.

What? What is it?

Oh nothing.

Monica let me see out the window.

Oh My god. i have to go over there right now. Phoebe slammed the door on her way out and ran over to Ross' old apartment.

Joey woke up to some noise in the hallway. It was a lady screaming get the hell out of the way. The voice sounded very familar but he just couldn't figure out who it belonged to. Then he saw the door Knob turn and in came Phoebe.

What the hell are you doing?

Joey What's going on? Rachel said sleepily.

O0o0o no Phoebe it's not what it looks like.

I think this is exactly what it looks like.

No Phoebe your wrong.

Oh bud out of this you tramp.

Excuse me.

You heard me Rachel. And with that Phoebe stormed out of the apartment. She ran down the stairs and across the street crying. At the same time Joey was in the apartment with his head in his hands.

Oh Joey I'm sorry.

Yeah i guess it just wasn't meant to be.

Well you know she didn't say she didn't want to be with you anymore. she's just mad at you.Tell you what.  
I'll help you get Phoebe back into your life. It's the least i can do. Think of it as my way of saying thanks for comforting me last night.

Well i guess so.

Great let's get started. Alright so here's the plan: We are going to get Monica to call Phoebe and get her to go to dinner with her at a really fancy place but instead of Monica at the dinner table .....

4 o'clock that afternoon

Ring ring.

Hello Hey Pheebs.

Oh hi Monica.

What's up.

Oh nothing I just wanted to know if you wanted to go to dinner tonight. My treat.

Sure.

Ok. meet me at the Hard Rock Cafe in a hour.

Alright see you then.

5 o'clock that night

Phoebe was waiting at a table for Monica to arrive When she saw a pair of men's black dress shoes in front of her and she looked up. Joey what are you doing here. She said in a very angry tone.

I'm here for you Baby. I don't want to lose you like Ross kept losing Rachel and when they were finally together he died. I want to wake up everyday next to you. I want to have kids together. I want to grow old together. So I have Come to this conclusion. Joey said as he handed Phoebe a bunch of lilys. Then he bent down on one Knee and took A small ring bow from his pocket. PHOEBE BUFFAY WILL YOU MARRY ME.

Yes i will. Joey slid the ring on her finger and then they kissed as the whole resturant clapped for them.

What do you say we go celebrate our engagement.

Sure. Oh wait i was suppose to have dinner with Monica.

No. that was just to get you here.

Oh. Ok then. And at that very moment Joey swooped Phoebe off her feet and carried her out of then resturant. 


	5. The start of a case

chapter 5 The start of a case.

2 days later...

Now that Rachel fixed things between Joey and Phoebe only one thing ran through her mind who killed Ross and why? Rachel was determined to answer the mysterrious questions so she was going to hired a detcetive. She walk up the stairs and in front of her written on the door was Sammy liggs private eye. she opened the door and then she said...

Hey you sammy?

Maybe i am maybe i ain't. whats it to you?

You intrested in a murder case?

I'm opened to anything. Fill me in with the details.

So she did.

Meanwhile...

Monica I am so nerevous I can't believe i'm getting married in a month. You have to help me plan all the details.  
O0o0o you could be my wedding planner.

Well alright.

So let's get started. I was thinking lily's and tulips for the flowers. For the bridesmaids i was thinking of an ice blue color and for the theme i was thinking Cinderella. How does that sound Mon?

It's sounds like a good start now we need to go get some picture books on cinderella to set the backround and we need to get a flourist, a baker, a chef, a band, and we need to find a reception hall. Oh wait what about your dress?

I still need to pick one out.

Ok then how about i meet you at the bridel shop in a hour to pick out the dresses and tuxedos for everyone?

Sure. See you then.

Back to the case...

So what you tellin me is that someone shot your husband while he was driving?

Yes.

Ok well let's start by Traces his steps that week and getting some suspects.

Whatever you say, your the boss.

Ok on monday morning where did your husband go....

After a few hours of talking Rachel and Sammy were able to come up with 6 suspects in this order:

Janice Chandeler's ex girlfriend She spent Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday afternoon with him.

Gunther Coffee house guy and Rachel lover He was always envied Ross for his relationship with Rachel.

Mona Ross' last ex She was always being lied to by Ross. could be revenge and she saw him at the news stand Three times that week.

Barry Rachel's ex He didn't get along with Ross after he went to his and Mindy's wedding.

Joey Rachel and Ross' Friend He was in love with Rachel.

And last but not least...

Monica Ross' sister Could have envied the fact that he had a perfect family.

Now the two just had to figure out which of the 6 it was.

Well, now that we got our suspects, lets get our killer... 


	6. The end of the case

chapter6 The end of the case

So exactly how are we going to do this.

Well here's what we are going to do, we have to secretly follow each of the suspects and write down all strange behavior.

Ok. I can do that.

Then as we go along we can eliminate people from the list.

Alright let's start with monica because she was the closest to him. No problem she is my best friend so she won't think I'm stalking her.

Ok. Since you know Monica and Joey you watch them I'll watch Mona and Gunther for right now. You got that. Meet me back at my office in 4 hours.And with that Sammy and Rachel split up in search of who could be the killer....

Meanwhile....

Oh Phoebe that dress is perfect on you and it goes great with the theme because when Cinderella is dancing at the ball her dress looks exactly like thet but in blue.

Really? Ok then I'll take it.

Now we are going to buy this dress and the white tuxedo with the ice blue vest for Joey today. I already put the order in for the white tuxedos for the groomsmen and the ice blue dresses for the bridesmaids.

Hello and how are you today? The clerk said with a smile on her face.

We are good. we are going to buy these today and we already place the order for the other tuxedos and dresses. Then Phoebe payed the clerk and they were of to the flourist to pick the flowers out and place a order.

Hey Monica I found the perfect floweres ok then let's place the order.

Hello we would like to place a order under the name of Phoebe buffay.

Ok and what kind of flowers are you ordering.

Lilys, Tulips and Roses.

And how many of each would you like and in what color.

We would like to order 100 peach tulips, 125 white lilys and 50 yellow roses.

Well your all payed for have a nice day.

Then they went to the baker, chef, and after they picked a reception hall.

Back to the case again....

Rachel and Sammy met back at the office they both had elimenated both of their suspects so now they have to study the last two suspects and they'll have their killer.

Alright dollface we down to two. All we have to do is find out which one it is and then you'll know the truth.  
you take Barry and I'll take Janice meet back her in one hour.

Rachel left the office quickly to perform her task and then she will know who killed the love of her life and the Father of her child.At that moment Rachel started to feel funny. She felt as if she was going to vomit so she ran up to her apartment and straight into the bathroom. Next she thought uh oh this isn't good....

After She came out of the bathroom she ran down stairs and caught a cab. She went to Barry's house and what she uncovered was shocking.

The hour was up Rachel found out who was behind all her pain and suffering.

It was JANICE Sammy cried out loud. I saw her pay the hit man she hired to kill ross and i found her finger print on the gun the guy use to kill Ross. Also I found a recording of her telling the guy she couldn't take anymore of his whining over his divorce and then his bragging over his new marrage. Also according to you Barry was out of town all of last week. Well dollface let's go get that demon of yours and get her and her friend lock up in jail for life.

Freeze Janice your under arrest. Sammy exclaimed.

For what?

Don't give me that crap i no you killed my husband.

You do?

Thats right Janice the jig is up. Sammy said with a feeling of accomplishment.

Janice was locked up in jail for a life sentence and Rachel went home. 


	7. 2 weddings and a baby

chapter 7 2 weddings and a baby

Rachel woke very sick that morning. So sick infact that she had to run to the bathroom.  
When she did she wokeup Phoebe and Joey in the next room.

Joey what was that noise?

Oh it's probably just Rachel getting ready for work.

On a saturday? i don't think so come on let's go see what's up.

Phoebe knock on the door to the bathroom.

Rache are you alright.

Yeah i think i just have a stomach virus.

Are you sure it's a stomach virus. It might be that your pregnant.

That's nonsense.

Well take a test just to check.

ok Pheebs whatever you say but i'm telling you it's gonna be negetive.

Ten minnutes later...

Rachel um you better come out of the bedroom and see this.

What?

Um well it's positive.

Oh my god! How is that possible i haven't slept with anyone since Ross died.

Well the baby might be his.

Go figure. Joey said starting to understand the conversation.

No i can't raise Emma and another baby.

Well Rache it looks like you are gonning to have to.

O my god.

Het joey go get Monica.

Joey followed Phoebe's orders and went to go get Monica. As usual Joey just walk right in to Monica's apartment and opened the fridge and got something to eat and then he woke up Monica so Phoebe wouldn't get mad at him.

Monica got up and walk over to Joey's apartment very sleepishly. She went in and found Rachel crying onthe couch.

Rachel what's wrong?

Monica i just found out i'm pregnant agian.

Who's the father?

Ross.

O my god. Rachel we are all here for you.

And i'll go to all the doctors apointments with and everything since I sort of did that last time.Joey replied.

Thanks you guys. i'm going to Ross's apartment for a while.

Ok.

I'm going back to sleep. Joey said.

Hey Phoebe how about I meet you downstairs in an hour so we can go pick up the clothes for the wedding.

Sure see you then.

1 hour later.....

Hey Monica over here.

Hey Pheebs. Let's got get the clothes and don't forget tonight is the rehersal dinner.

I won't it's my wedding.

1 hour later....

Ok so we got the clothes and gave it to all the bridesmaids and groomsmen, we have the hall all set up for tonight ,  
we have the flourist and the food service getting the hotel ready and we have the band coming at 2:00pm tomorrow.  
Everything is all set. You must be so excited to be getting married tomorrow.

Yes i am but wait until tonight at the rehersal dinner when there will be a surprise for you.

Me. Why me? it's your rehersal dinner.

You'll see when you get there.

At the rehersal dinner....

OK everyone's here. now I think it's time for the best man to say some words. Chandler.

OK here it goes. I've know Phoebe and Joey for along time and i feel that they are strangely perfect for each other. You see we all started out as friends but Phoebe and joey's relationship grew to much more. Just like mine and Monica's did at some point. When Monica and I were married Joey and Phoebe supported us and was very excited for us. Now it;s my turn to be excited for them. I wish you the best in your marriage. And now with the permission from the Bride i have I would like to say Monica I really sorry and I don't want to let you slip away and I will never do anything to hurt you ever.  
so(he said as he bent down on 1 knee) Monica geller will you marry me.

Yes I will. She said as tears were streaming down her face. Phoebe you knew about this. You are so sneaky. But thanks for not letting me lose him.

Aw it was nothing. 


	8. THE WEDDING

THE WEDDING…

After the rehersal dinner all the people went home in excitement for the wedding tom.

Last to leave was Phoebe and Joey. They decided to walk home. As they were walking along the street under the stars that talked about how much they were going to love being married and how happy they were for Monica and Chandler. Then Joey walked Phoebe to her apartment and then head home. The next day Phoebe woke up and ran to Monica's apartment.

Monica I can't believe I'm getting married today.

I know it is so exciting.

Well the ceremony starts in 3 hours so I better start getting ready.

Monica help Phoebe get all her stuff together and then she got her stuff and they both headed out for the plaza hotel where Phoebe and Joey are going to get married.

Hey everybody I'm getting married today. Phoebe yelled in the room where all the girls in the ceremony are getting dressed up.

Meanwhile…

Joey was in the room where all the guys were getting all dressed up. He was telling them all about Phoebe and how much he loved her.

And she has the cutest laugh and I really feel like she understands me.

That's great man I'm really happy for you. Chandler said as he fixed Joey's bow tie.

Now go out there and married the girl of your dreams.

3 hours later…

Everyone take your seats as the ceremony will be starting in a few minutes.

The band starts to play. Now the bridesmaids and groomsmen start to make their way down the isle. Next the flower girl and ring barer walk down the isle. Then the band changes their tune and everyone starts to rise as the bride walks down the isle. Then she turns towards Joey and smiles. Then they both face the priest and the ceremony begins.

Dearly beloved we are gather here today to join these two souls in the bond of matrimony…

Phoebe Buffay do you take Joseph Tribbiani to be your lawfully wedded husband…

I DO

Joseph Tribbiani do you take Phoebe Buffay to be your lawfully wedded wife.

I DO


	9. the wedding part two

The wedding part two

Now you husband and wife. On that note everyone shouted with joy and started to blow bubbles at the couple as they walked down the isle.

At the reception…

The glasses start to chime as the people tap them with their butter knifes to here Chandler and speech.

Hey how's everybody doing tonight? Or In the words of Joey to his a chick How you doin. Well Joe those days are over there is only 1 chick you can say that to and maybe your wife. Chandler said with a smirk on his face. (The room fills with laughter.) Ok settle down. Alright my name is Chandler and this is the happiest day for me besides the time I got married. Anyway I think Joey and Phoebe belong together because when I first met both of them I thought wow your strange. Also they could not be anymore perfect because when I see them together I feel just like I did when Monica and I were married. You know that feeling when the world could collapses beneath your feet and the only thing you care about is the person right in front of you. (Monica starts to cry) Joey don't ever lose her because you might not get a second chance. I made a mistake and I let the love of my life go and I tried everything to get her back and up until yesterday I thought I would never get her back but I got that second chance. Don't go threw what I did stay together in everlasting love. And with that they all raised their glasses and said cheers.

Then the music starts to play and all the couples join in with Phoebe and Joey as they dance to their wedding song.

_A moment like this_

_Some people wait a lifetime_

_For that one special kiss…_

After that everybody danced the night away.

The next morning…

Monica I have a surprise for you.

What is it?

Come outside the bedroom and look.

Ok. OH MY GOD.

What do you think? (Chandler said as he put his hands up in the air while Monica was staring at the guest room.)

The room was all clean out and redecorated. There was white wall paper with blue, pink, green, and yellow bunnies on it, a changing table, a mobile hanging over a lacey white bassinet in the corner and a bid sign hanging at the top of the room that said I'm ready for whatever comes our way let's have a baby.

Monica ran over to Chandler and gave him a big hug. Then she said let's get remarried. So a few weeks later they did. Almost a year later they had a baby girl named jasmine Elizabeth Bing.


	10. authors note

_The message _

_well that's all folks …_

_Sorry but that's all the words I have left for this story. Bye_

_Oh and by the way Rachel did have her baby and it did belong to Ross._

_It was a baby boy named Ross jr. _

_So now I must leave this story behind and venture to where a new one begins bye._

_Amanda_


End file.
